Tools to Face Your Fears

I’m sure my tribe have been following the photographs, but I know many of them want to hear the story. I’ve been dreaming about the WA area long before a name was put to it, and then several years after I game my dream a name with a destination. It’s been an absolutely unreal ride. It started when I found out Philips Oral Health Care was actually coming to Atlanta for a limited number/ invitation only interview. We had moved to Savannah to be closer to job opportunity because I knew companies were always stopping by SCAD.

There we were. The hubby, Mr. G, and myself had dropped everything and headed toward Atlanta for an adventure. I was 1 of 8 to be interviewed. I had to miss a day of class, and may I just say it was WORTH IT! I sat down with the Art Director. There was something about him that was mellow, relaxed, and completely approachable despite my nerves of getting there moments before after a 4 hour drive with a toddler.

We went through my process book. He was actually interested in what I had to say. I remember being surprised because so many people had gone completely deaf to what I had to say once they heard the words “Teaching Kids to Code”. It seems like those words register in the same area of pain and anguish as math, but not to this man. He was intrigued. He listened to every level, asked questions to which I had answers to! He was great. Just like that we were done, and then it was the waiting game. Yes, I just drove 4 hours for a 20 minute interview. It was a complete chance. It was a risk. Most adventures are.

After two months of waiting, I decided to carry on with my last semester. It was a mixture of emotions, and unknowns. I had to keep my eye on the prize. There is someone out there for everyone. There is a perfect team waiting for you.

Then I got the call. My info was passed off to a recruiter, and I had a job offer. I was in the second week of school. Commence joyous freak out. I had to my recruiter, “Oh my gosh! Okay… I’m REALLY trying to play it cool right now, but I’m freaking out with excitement.” She began to chuckle at my response replying, “Oh you’re totally cool right now. Don’t worry.”

After that call, during the negotiations, and the whole process here I was flooded with fear. Here’s some tools for you to help you face your fears.

Know your worth.

Let this be a testimony to the artists out there. Please learn faster than it took me to know your worth. Find it. Be confident in it. Hold onto it. DON’T LET IT GO. Don’t compromise it. There is someone out there who wants you, who you’re a perfect fit for, and they will work with you. Anyone can take the road of taking advantage of you. Your gift is unique to you, and people have no problem using it for free. Hell, they’ll even act like they’re the one doing you the favor. If someone wants you that means they see something of value and worth in what you have to offer. Plenty of people will use your gift to elevate themselves. The only ones worth while are the ones who will value enough to pay you for it. Not everyone has money. I did graphic work for a youth group, and they paid me in coffee cards and gratitude. Hands down I will hold that pastor and his youth team in my heart till the end of days.

It’s okay to fly.

I’m going to be completely transparent with you. I have PTSD about flying. I knew I needed to fly to my destination to get to my dreams. That was not an easy fear to face.

When I was 17 my friend had his pilots license. He wanted to take me and my friends in his parent’s plane to see the Christmas lights at night. Like any fearless dumbass teenager who loved flying, I was completely down for it. He took us up individually. It was him and I in this little two person plane. The other seats were taken out. It was beautiful seeing the vast darkness of the ocean, and out little beach town glittering with lights. I was through the moon. Then it happened…

Him: “Oh my God! I my controls aren’t working. You’re going to have to fly the plane! Quick, grab the wheel!”
Me: Ball of anxiety triggered. Death is imminent. “What?! No! I don’t know how to fly. You take the wheel!”
Him: “No! If I let go then we will crash! Grab your wheel! Just touch the wheel.”
Me: Completely terrified and making terms with death. Touches the wheel.
Him: Completely calm. “Now see that wasn’t so bad was it?”

Yes. It ended up being a prank. Well thanks to him, thank prank has followed me through life. The month and a half before my flight to WA, my anxiety monster was convinced we would splat before even getting to live the dream. Realistic? No. Anxiety doesn’t care about reality. I had to fight it. I had friends help, give tips, and encourage me. Guess what? Mom mode took over my fears on the plane. I didn’t pass those fears to my son. The flight was smooth. He was a champ. We even got beautiful photos. When my feet touched solid ground I swear I was about to do back flips. Find your tribe because they will help you through your darkest fears, and they’ll remind you of reality.

Blessed are the flexible for they will bend, but not break.

The biggest creature comfort sacrifice was giving up my car to get here. I’m sure most people in Europe just chuckled or gave an eye roll, but in the US we are very attached to our transportation. Not only did I have one car, but I had two cars that stayed behind. Why not ship it, you ask? Because moving is freaking expensive, and it cost just as much to ship them as it would to sell

My first day of work the hubby dropped me off on his way to return our rental. I decided to walk home because it was beautiful enough. What I forgot was that WA has hills… oh, and I didn’t realize it was a 3 mile walk home. Half way through I was torn between “Worst idea ever,” and “Omg! Yummy blackberries!”. The second day I took uber. Got propositioned for Jesus. Met a fun nerdy guy who drank monster. Unfortunately again, moving took every penny I had. So… I quickly bought a bus pass… by me, I mean sent the hubby to the store to buy it for me. I rode the bus for the rest of the

Do I miss my car? Hell yea, but in the same respect it wasn’t worth keeping my car and sacrificing my dream of being a designer. You’d be surprised how far flexibility will carry you, and what it can teach. It opens you up to possibilities instead of being stuck in cycles.

So there you have it. 3 fears conquered on this new adventure. I encourage you to face the things that scare you. Chances are your anxiety is mismanaging your creativity. Chances are things can go better than planned. Even if they don’t, no seed planted goes unharvested. It might just take a little bit more time. Any dream chasing comes with fears attached. They will grow and elevate you should you choose to face them. What are some fears you’d like to conquer to get to where you need to be? I can almost guarantee you that any person you feel is successful or living the dream had to face something within themselves.

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